[7.17] [DOCS] Telemetry settings: improve phrasing (#158396) (#158478)

# Backport This will backport the following commits from `main` to `7.17`: - [[DOCS] Telemetry settings: improve phrasing (#158396)](#158396)  ### Questions ? Please refer to the [Backport tool documentation](https://github.com/sqren/backport) \n\n### Questions ?\nPlease refer to the [Backport tool\ndocumentation](https://github.com/sqren/backport)\n\n\n\nCo-authored-by: Alejandro Fernández Haro <[email protected]>"}},{"branch":"main","label":"v8.9.0","labelRegex":"^v8.9.0$","isSourceBranch":true,"state":"MERGED","url":"https://github.com/elastic/kibana/pull/158396","number":158396,"mergeCommit":{"message":"[DOCS] Telemetry settings: improve phrasing (#158396)","sha":"995b0a46e9da573d14bf0e5af27b4b028bd5293d"}}]}] BACKPORT-->
elastic · May 25, 2023 · 44c6ba6 · 44c6ba6
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diff --git a/docs/settings/telemetry-settings.asciidoc b/docs/settings/telemetry-settings.asciidoc
@@ -4,15 +4,13 @@
 <titleabbrev>Telemetry settings</titleabbrev>
 ++++
 
-By default, Usage Collection (also known as Telemetry) is enabled. This
-helps us learn about the {kib} features that our users are most interested in, so we
-can focus our efforts on making them even better.
+Usage Collection (also known as Telemetry) is enabled by default. This allows us to learn what our users are most interested in, so we can improve our products and services.
+
+Refer to our https://www.elastic.co/legal/product-privacy-statement[Privacy Statement] to learn more.
 
 You can control whether this data is sent from the {kib} servers, or if it should be sent
 from the user's browser, in case a firewall is blocking the connections from the server. Additionally, you can decide to completely disable this feature either in the config file or in {kib} via *Management > Kibana > Advanced Settings > Usage Data*.
 
-Refer to our https://www.elastic.co/legal/product-privacy-statement[Privacy Statement] to learn more.
-
 [float]
 [[telemetry-general-settings]]
 ==== General telemetry settings
@@ -30,11 +28,15 @@ Refer to our https://www.elastic.co/legal/product-privacy-statement[Privacy Stat
   when they are navigating through {kib}. Defaults to `'server'`.
 
 [[telemetry-optIn]] `telemetry.optIn`::
-  Set to `true` to automatically opt into reporting cluster statistics. You can also opt out through
-  *Advanced Settings* in {kib}. Defaults to `true`.
+  Set to `false` to stop sending any telemetry data to Elastic. Reporting your
+cluster statistics helps us improve your user experience. *Default: `true`.* +
++
+This setting can be changed at any time in <<advanced-options, Advanced Settings>>.
+To prevent users from disabling it,
+set <<telemetry-allowChangingOptInStatus, `telemetry.allowChangingOptInStatus`>> to `false` and <<settings-telemetry-optIn, `telemetry.optIn`>> to `true`.
 
 `telemetry.allowChangingOptInStatus`::
-  Set to `true` to allow overwriting the <<telemetry-optIn, `telemetry.optIn`>> setting via the {kib} UI. Defaults to `true`. +
+  Set to `false` to disallow overwriting the <<telemetry-optIn, `telemetry.optIn`>> setting via the <<advanced-options, Advanced Settings>> in {kib}. *Default: `true`.* +
 +
 [NOTE]
 ============

diff --git a/docs/setup/settings.asciidoc b/docs/setup/settings.asciidoc
@@ -806,16 +806,18 @@ setting this to `true` enables unauthenticated users to access the {kib}
 server status API and status page. *Default: `false`*
 
 [[telemetry-allowChangingOptInStatus]] `telemetry.allowChangingOptInStatus`::
-When `true`, users are able to change the telemetry setting at a later time in
-<<advanced-options, Advanced Settings>>.  When `false`,
-{kib} looks at the value of <<settings-telemetry-optIn, `telemetry.optIn`>> to determine whether to send
-telemetry data or not. <<telemetry-allowChangingOptInStatus, `telemetry.allowChangingOptInStatus`>> and <<settings-telemetry-optIn, `telemetry.optIn`>>
+When `false`, users cannot change the opt-in status through <<advanced-options, Advanced Settings>>, and
+{kib} only looks at the value of <<settings-telemetry-optIn, `telemetry.optIn`>> to determine whether to send telemetry data or not. <<telemetry-allowChangingOptInStatus, `telemetry.allowChangingOptInStatus`>> and <<settings-telemetry-optIn, `telemetry.optIn`>>
 cannot be `false` at the same time. *Default: `true`*.
 
 [[settings-telemetry-optIn]] `telemetry.optIn`::
-When `true`, telemetry data is sent to Elastic.
-When `false`, collection of telemetry data is disabled.
-To enable telemetry and prevent users from disabling it,
+Set to `false` to stop sending any telemetry data to Elastic.
+Reporting your cluster statistics helps
+us improve your user experience.
+When `false`, the telemetry data is never sent to Elastic. +
++
+This setting can be changed at any time in <<advanced-options, Advanced Settings>>.
+To prevent users from disabling it,
 set <<telemetry-allowChangingOptInStatus, `telemetry.allowChangingOptInStatus`>> to `false` and <<settings-telemetry-optIn, `telemetry.optIn`>> to `true`.
 *Default: `true`*